Spontaneous Failure to Communicate ~ BitterSweetLife

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Spontaneous Failure to Communicate

And now for something completely different.

Like lightning from a clear sky, the inability to communicate can strike without warning. Notice I didn't say, "difficulty in communicating." Nope. That happens frequently, right? It's an unpleasant side effect of the otherwise gorgeous phenomenon of being human and have two different genders.

What I'm describing is similar to what typically happens when you contact tech help for assistance with your online service.

Syed}
I apologize for not being able to access your new emails in MSN.

{Ariel Vanderhorst}
So how do I fix this?

{Syed}
Sometimes this issue is caused due to the migration of your account to a new & better performace server...Areil, I cannot give a time frame in which this issue is going to be resolved. However, I will give you some steps to troubleshoot this issue, which may resolve the issue. However, if the issue persists even after performing these steps, I would request you to wait for sometime till the migration process completes.

The situation I'm describing would be similar to two people speaking to each other in two different languages, assuming that communication was taking place, then waking up to the fact that if Person B understood what I was saying at this moment, he wouldn't have that silly grin on his face.

Further illustration...
Q: Can you tell me how to get to the intersection of 1oth and Broadway?
A: 10th and Broadway is not where the arena is located, but if you don't know how to drive, you shouldn't be downtown in the first place.

Q: What time does the game start?
A: If you want to play basketball, you had better get some decent shoes and a haircut.

Or more to the point:
Q: It is really hot outside--did you hear the weather forecast?
A: Say that again and I'll punch your lights out.

Some of you are still looking for the uniting thread in my examples, and I appreciate that, because it reveals that you have high expectations for this blog. Rather than strange, nonsensical snatches of conversation, you're looking for witty, apparent non sequitors that actually illuminate profound truths about the meaning of life. Unfortunately, nothing like that is going on right now.

I had better not say anything more, except to note that I'm not describing myself and Lindsay, that I represent the guy asking the questions above, and that this weirdness could very well affect my GPA. Let this be a cautionary tale for those of you in school. Carefully document your interactions with higher-ups. This could happen to you, is what I'm saying.



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2 comments:

John said...

This is why I go for Gmail and Trillian. Gmail has basically unlimited storage space, and you can easily search it for anything, while Trillian can automatically record all of my conversations. It makes things so much easier when trying to win a "you totally said _____" argument.

Good luck with all of that though. I've had many times when people thought they told me things, but really didn't. Like, just this afternoon, I found out I'm going to Illinois for Thanksgiving. Apparently I was told this, but I think I would remember something like that.

Ariel said...

It's the "live" conversations that will bring you down every time. No corroborating evidence.

 

Culture. Photos. Life's nagging questions. - BitterSweetLife