The Final Drink ~ BitterSweetLife

Thursday, April 05, 2007

The Final Drink

I drank the magic coffee.

My veins stretched themselves out like rubber bands, snapped to attention, then relaxed into florescent health. The tired, unhealthy flush faded from my face and the lines on my forehead filled themselves in. I sensed that my skin was glowing.

The coffee was boiling hot with cool, mysterious undercurrents. It tasted like...not Kenyan. Not Costa Rican. But definitely exotic. It flashed through my system in moments and left no residue, a restorative cocktail. A shocking elixir. What was in this stuff? Elastin? Good bacteria? Was it coffee at all?

I felt the crunchy cartilage in my knees grow smooth and silver and the sagging vertebrae in my back jumped to their old places like all-star gymnasts. I bent down and touched my toes. Easy. I ran to the closet and opened my toolbox and grabbed my old yellow tape measure. Clumsily, but with growing excitement, I measured my vertical. Thirty-nine--No, fifty-one inches. Not only were my old ups back--I had added a foot of pure verticality, and enough hang time to put a dollar on top of the backboard and then make change.

After I had stopped jumping up and down in the living room, I yelled for Lindsay. The reverberations made me jump (again). My voice had a steady, liquid quality. In fact, the sore-throat raspyness I had grown accustomed to was gone. I tried humming. Wow. I sang a few lines of Coldplay. Incredible. "Lindsay! Lindsay! Come in here and try this coffee."

"What's going on, honey?"
"You wouldn't believe me if I told you! Just get in here." She laughed.
"OK, I'm coming. This had better be good."

As Lindsay walked through the doorway, I woke up and saw that she was already lying next to me and it was 5:45 and I would need to get up in half an hour. My vision was fuzzy, my back hurt and my face was flushed with some kind of flu bug. I reached for the magic coffee--but it was gone. The digital alarm clock stared at me balefully, an inadequate substitute. I sighed and lay back down. It was just a dream, and yet not.

There is no magic coffee on earth, but make no mistake, I'll be getting some one of these days.

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Steve said...

Have you gotten into that bag of Ad Astra yet? I'm hoping it's not bad.

Ariel said...

"Bad?" You've got the be kidding. Those coffee beans are excellent. Dark, smoky roast...reminiscent of magic coffee.

Anonymous said...

That's cool. I didn't know how they would be since I'd never tried them. Though, I'm sure if they were reminiscent of sweaty gym socks I would have heard about it.

I'm reminded of an old skit, SNL maybe, but I'm not sure.

"At this five-star restaurant, we've secretly replaced their coffee with ground up clam shells and sand. Let's see what the diners think."


Culture. Photos. Life's nagging questions. - BitterSweetLife