We've pulled out the "big boy" card with Aidan, but I'm not sure he's buying it.
"Time to go to bed like a big boy," I tell him.
"No, wait," he says. "There have to be some qualifying conditions on this 'big boy' status. You're saying that 'big boys' eat their food without rubbing it in their hair, don't throw daddy-books, and go to bed without crying for half an hour. But there need to be some accompanying benefits. For example, being able to catch water in my mouth in the shower so I can spit it at you--a 'big boy' should definitely have that figured out. And I should be able to use your shaver, eat marshmallows for breakfast, and hold your mug of 'hot coffee' so I can see how hot it is for myself, without intervention."
"Fine," I said. "Time to go to bed like a little boy."
"Thank you. WAAAAAAAAH!"