Will it never end? Today I endured the indignity of another birthday. Lindsay and my family did the best they could to ease the passing, but I still felt acutely the loss of another year. Funny how we celebrate the installation of these little pieces in a jigsaw puzzle...when complete, it will culminate in the picture of a corpse.
::
A little harsh, huh? I tend to agree. But perfectly logical. I was thinking today, as I calculated how many years I have left to realize my dream of playing in the NBA, that birthdays should hardly be a cause of celebration - without a very significant caveat. After all, what is a birthday? Originally, it's just that - but only once. After you leave ground zero, the celebrations become decidedly morbid. Something like trees cheering the strokes of a woodcutter. Age is the enemy. Why applaud it?
::
C'mon, you say. We're celebrating the wisdom, the increased acumen, the achievements - not the wrinkles. The scoring titles and NCAA rings and book deals, if you will. Why cry about the sweat?
Because it's not just sweat we're losing. It's life that's trickling away. And death, I'm convinced, is not a necessary corollary to wisdom and victory. Who says you have to get old to get brilliant? Why should it be that way? I, for one, am not buying it. I'm not willing to give death a free pass "just because" it makes me smarter.
::
So what's your point? you ask. Thank you very much for making me depressed; I hope I can do the same for you on my birthday...
::
Here's what I think. There's a certain level of insincerity in celebrating birthdays - if we have no expectation of life being restored. Maybe I'm overly given to melancholy, but I sometimes find myself noticing a kind of pathos surrounding these celebrations of fleeting years. Sometimes the clapping seems wistful, slightly anxious, if you follow me. Birthday parties can take on the dimensions of a security blanket, and, especially later in life, the fabric starts wearing thin.
I'm sorry for being so awful!
::
You may be surprised to learn that I actually did celebrate my birthday. Really! I had a good time, there was joy, laughter, and no quoting of Nietzsche or Hamlet. What strikes me, though, is that such a party would be ridiculous without Christ. Add Jesus to the life equation, and uproarious parties make perfect sense. Subtract him, and birthdays seem a flimsy facade.
This post isn't really a diatribe. It's a thank you note.
Thank you Jesus, for giving us something to celebrate in these moments of paradox. On my birthday, life ticks away and life looms nearer. I'm getting older and younger. Creaky knees are divining rods; the vibrations I'm feeling reveal that the fountain of youth is approaching.
The mysterious joy and transitory death make for a bracing atmosphere. Because of Christ, I can drink it in like a magic elixir. Birthdays become a vintage brew, seasoned by a God-man. Jesus took on the spectre of aging, and he proved death-proof. Christ trumped our mortality. But without him?
Without Jesus?
Well. Why ask such a morbid question on my birthday!?
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Happy Birthday, You're Dying!
Filed in: Bittersweetness Christ Death Paradox
Subscribe to:
or 
or
10 comments:
HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY Ariel!!!!
Happy birthday, brother...you couldn't have picked a better day for a birthday --- it's mine too!
When you think about it you're not actually turning a year older on your birthday (that has been happening steadily), just one day older.
Maybe we're celebrating surviving another year in a world that has a lot happening to try and take your life away? (I've been studying for my clin med exam, so many diseases). Just a thought.
happy birthday Ariel!!! as one of my kids completely annoying sing-along videos said..."celebrate the day that Jesus sent you to the earth" Life is not simply a ticker taking us to judgement (and heaven) but as you so well put it a bittersweet journey that shows us EXACTLY how hard it is to be a perfect sacrifice...and exactly what we have done that makes that perfect sacrifce soooo AWE-some (in the "obselete" sense). And the fact that it was all done in LOVE and a desire to be intimate with us. truly a day to celebrate :) glad you got everything back up and running around here :)
I think the actual significance of celebrating a birthday has nothing to do with increased wisdom or wrinkles. Rather it celebrates the fact that you're not dead yet. Age and survival corrolations weren't nearly as high as they are today...
jess :): you're not actually turning a year older on your birthday (that has been happening steadily), just one day older.
Great, just what I needed - the voice of reason to undermine the gist of my post. ;) However, your point rightly implies that the bittersweet essence of Birthday should be applied equally to every day of the spiritual journey.
momma: Life is not simply a ticker taking us to judgement (and heaven)...
I like the way you put that. Life is certainly not merely elapsed time - it has a texture and voice of "it's own" - the meaning that Christ has infused it with.
tim: ...it celebrates the fact that you're not dead yet.
Brilliant. Now why didn't I think of that? Although this would be more readily apparent in those historical days when life was "nasty, brutish and short."
Thanks for the birthday wishes, guys!
"I, for one, am not buying it. I'm not willing to give death a free pass "just because" it makes me smarter."
I love it. I often give my mother grief when she begans to say I do not understand something. Her usual implied reason I a call the "age trump card." Nothing aggravates me more. This is not to say I understand whatever the problem in question is, but at least call my ignorance on a grounds which will allow for a solution. Otherwise the question is when is old old enough?
Other age questions:
At what age do I stop like rock and start loving classical? Is it the same age that I began to save all of my change? And do these two questions have any corrolation?
BTW, happy birthday.
Happy Birthday one day late!!
I agree with the point of your post, but I will say that we often celebrate birthdays to celebrate life and the preciousness of an individual person. Birthdays can be a time to focus in on one person and celebrate their worth...we so often forget in our"me-centeredness" to praise, build up, and give joy to others.
LEV
Ok, so I'm a little late, but happy birthday anyway!
I loved this post, btw. Your point is wonderful. It really is kind of odd that we would celebrate birthdays--or life at all--if the material world were all there is. But, fortunately, the material world is NOT all there is. :-)
Post a Comment